Transforming Optimus

I need to explain my geeky reasoning behind this before going too far.  A few months ago, I was researching modeling.  As in, car model kits.  Not modeling for Victoria's Secret.  As much fun as it would be to see me in heels, cars and actual models don't go together.  Oh wait.  Yeah they do.  Nevermind.  As I was saying...concerning car models...I discovered that no one as of yet, had manufactured any Transformer models.  They have diecast models and things like that, but nothing you could actually build  and paint yourself.  At least yet.  In my search, I found that people (modeling folk like myself) had actually started buying the Transformers toys and painstakingly detailing them, with weathering, more accurate colors, etc.  I thought it was an interesting idea and am going to try it.  So, when my wife said, 'honey, I need your Christmas list', I added Optimus Prime to the list.  In toy form.  Yep.  That's right.  Optimus freakin' Prime.  For those that don't know, he's the semi. 

Much to my wife's dismay, she obliged, and believe it or not, I unwrapped him at Christmas with no shame.  I felt like a kid again.  It was great.  I think I did hear her say at one point, 'I can't believe I'm bought a Transformer for my 35 year old husband.'  Like I said - no shame.  I have a plan for this dude.  

As I opened the box, I noticed on the front cover it said '5 years and up.'  I thought, shit, I can handle this.  I couldn't have been more wrong.  As I removed the packaging surrounding Optimus, I pulled out a folded instruction sheet.  My eyes widened as I unfolded the sheet, outlining all 27 steps to transform him.  27 steps!  It came 'untransformed' as Optimus in character form.  So, my goal became to transform him into the semi.  My attempt lasted a few hours before I gave up and handed it to my brother.  

Could Justin do it?  Nope.  He gave it a valiant effort though.

Could Amber do it?  Nope.  Although, she got him farther along than my brother or I did.  (Notice the instruction sheet she's holding.)

After even more dismay, my wife, never to back down from a puzzle challenge, decided to try it.  90 minutes later, she got it.  

Remember the part where the box read, '5 years and up?'  Yeah, how in the world a kid is supposed to be able to handle this, let alone a whole series of these things is beyond me.  It took 4 grown adults to transform one toy.  I'd hate to see what Megatron is like.  Mean little bastard.   

Now I'm afraid to try re-transforming him.  Could be another whole day shot.  I know these things weren't that complicated when I was a kid.  I know it.